Date : Friday, June 26, 2009
Time : 11:17:00 am
Title : I will be

The past can't be forgotten because it continues to show up in the present. Many things can be left unsaid, but deep down I know how I feel. If only we knew, if only we both could foresee the future. Why must things turn out this way? I miss your smile, your spontaneousness, everything about you.

I admit that I do blame you for the things that have happened, but I wish I never did. How could I ever forget you and how dear you were (or 'were' should be replaced by 'are'?).

I guess I could see the past and future in my dreams. Its haunting me on regular basis. Someday, I shall be able to see what I've dreamt placed into reality. Maybe...





Dreams... what are they?

Date : Tuesday, June 23, 2009
Time : 8:17:00 pm
Title : The soul lingers

Date : Saturday, June 20, 2009
Time : 12:02:00 am
Title : pretty mummy

Dawn breaks.

I will dedicate a post to: Serene Chan S.L!!

She turns a year older today on 20 June. Oh well. HAPPY BIRTHDAY LADY!

We are kinda long lost friends.

I knew Xiao Dan way back then in Primary School and during then, the virtual game Neopets was quite 'on' then. Both of us played Neopets and I got to Xiao Dan's cousin, Serene through Neopets too! I started sending her Neomails if I'm not wrong and from there we corresponded. I was P5, she was P6 then. Haha. I still remember the neopets username... zzzz. Think the messages are still there if I log into Neopets nowBoth of us started talking on MSN some time later.

Xiao Dan had birthday parties every year when we were younger.... During my P6 to Secondary 2 years, she would throw a party at her house for that 3 years! We live very near to each other by the way. Lol. So every year during XD's parties, all her friends will come, and of cos her cousin Serene will come also.

At her birthday party, all the girls there had fun in XD's room yo! All those girls' stuff..... I still remember those silly times. :X Serene and me get along very well. hehehehe. Can say we are so fated to be friends....... It has been so many years since we knew each other!

Last time Friendster was very 'in' too, we also exchanged testimonials.

Okay let me fast forward to recent years. I am a constant reader on her blog! Till when I was in JC1 last year, for many reasons I had busy lives and didn't read her blog for like 8-9 months? Till last December when I FINALLY went her blog, I noticed so many changes in her life. And from then on, we started contacting again.

No photos in this post because we never took photos before... Not even when we were younger. The last time we met was in 2005?

Too bad you moved house, no more at the Telok Blangah area. Cos I do frequent the Harbour Front area when I attend my Soka activities. Last time you told me, if I am at Vivo, I can call you. But now, you don't frequent Vivo that often alrd right?

Nevertheless, we are still good friends! Hope we stay like that years down the road!

& I want to see your girl girl leh....... when when? :D



So anyone still wants to play Neopets? Hee!!!




Love the birthday girl! < 3

Date : Thursday, June 18, 2009
Time : 4:05:00 pm
Title : Past tenses, future tenses.

Life is a game of juggling, where we have to juggle many different balls. Things like work is a rubber ball- if you drop it, it will bounce back. Things like family, friends, health are like balls made of glass. Once you drop it, you'll never get it back.







“We’ll definitely be best friends forever,” you hear yourself saying. Your best friend gives a slight nod of the head, and you smile. Have you ever done something similar to this? Or maybe you’ve made a vow similar to this in the past. Many of these vows are done at a young age, preferably during childhood, sometimes even in secondary or high school years, unaware of the changes this vow may cause in the future.

When we were young, we were innocent, we think that nothing changes, everything will stay the way it is, blissfully. You do not have a fixed defination of what 'friends' are, life is carefree during childhood. You don't know how friendship happens, or how it started, but you and your best friend may have a common interest and have no clue what will happen when you grow up.

As we grow older, circumstances change us, things change, people change, interest changes. Friends go to different schools, move homes and stuffs. That changes relationships and friendships. Both change and you find that you are not on the same page with each other. Best friends drift apart. Some become enemies after incidents, things go wrong, situation change, friendships are broken.

There would really come a time were both will be separated from each other coz they can't be together all the time. I mean, they have different goals in life and I think that'll separate them from each other. We meet new people. We grow up, mature and move on.

Looking at the friendships I saw, sometimes, shit happens. Just a mere few months, great friends can become enemies. Why? Why things change within a short period of time? Whom used to be so close now become close to strangers. The people you know became people you knew. Everything changes. The distance, the friendships, the school.

I heard so much of promises. Like, 'I'll be your best friend for life'', ''I won't forget you'', ''I won't neglect someone special like you'', ''we will be in touch forever''. The friendship promises that were once made are now null and void. Words fall short. The times spent became memories left to reminisce. The cards, letters and gifts now become objects for looking back at the good times.

You make effort to keep in touch, people may not do the same. Why is there not even a text or a call? Not even a cyberspace message.

I hate friendships like this. NOT in the case of one, but MANY.

why why why..
I love you all

Its easy to say 'friends forever', 'best friends forever', but it may not be easy to keep up with that phrase in reality. Sometimes the unexpected happen.


But well, learn to let go. If its fated to be yours, it will be. If not, it never was.

I have friends who had broken friendships and they eventually meet in a new school. They may or may not reunite, but little did we know that they had a chance to meet each other in school.

___________________________________________________

I used to refute those who say that there are no such things as friends forever. I will say 'NO. ___ and me will be best friends forever, for life.'


But now?

I will say that 'besties' do exist, but what about 'friends forever', or even 'best friends for life'?


I think it's one in a million if people can stay best friends for life.







Blood runs thicker than water. Maybe, the only friends you can count on for life are people who share your blood. Maybe...

Date : Wednesday, June 17, 2009
Time : 10:02:00 pm
Title : Playfish

Date : Monday, June 15, 2009
Time : 9:38:00 pm
Title : !!!

lt i finally met you!!!

Date : Friday, June 12, 2009
Time : 12:03:00 am
Title : If only I know what's meant for us

Post dedicated to: Chiew Jovien

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

As of 12/06/09, she is of legal age! Can enter casino and learn driving yea!

I knew her since 2008 through my classmate, pri. Pri & I were close and they both live near each other. Shes different from other friends... she has a unique personality... how funny yet rare. Jojo is one special friend. ^^

She take concern into friends' problems, rmbr friends & can talk to almost anyone!

Jo, thanks for listen to my problems whenever you can. You can share with me next time also. Next time, lets share more erm, innocent, decent gossip. lets chat more! (:

Oh yea, & don't always rant nonstop about bacon. Lol.


Some candid pics;

do we look alike here? :D

Date : Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Time : 10:31:00 pm
Title : You lose control when you hold too tightly.

Packed my wardrobe today & realised I have too much clothes. I know I have way too many things........

I need moolah.

I have a pair of normal contact lenses I can put up for sale becos I don't need it anymore. if anyone's up for it............ (.....)

Date :
Time : 12:23:00 am
Title : Charisma

At one point of time or another, you would probably have been guilty of telling on your friend's secret when they trust you. Sometimes, we do have a tendency to have an itchy mouth or occassionally just had a slip of the tongue.



Have you ever accidentally slipped ur friend's personal details to another close mutual friend?
For eg,

'eh, do you know that XXX is from a single-parent family because (...) ?'
'actually XXX is not a virgin!'
'XXX got ___ points for her O levels. You don't tell her that I tell you hor!'
'the truth is, what happened between them was (...). you don't ask him ok.'





Then, maybe you may feel bad for slipping your tongue. But well, you think the person you told can be trusted to keep their mouth zipped. :/

Okay, truth is, no one is an angel. No one's perfect. We all make mistakes and do wrong things. You see, its human nature to tell on others unintentionally...... whether you mean harm or no harm.

Instead of focusing on one's flaw, why not look at ur attractive points? If only we could overlook those minor flaws in others and mark down their good points, relationships between humans could have been better......



But again, trust is hard to earn.

Date : Tuesday, June 09, 2009
Time : 11:11:00 pm
Title : The value of priceless

Helen Keller once said, when asked, do you want your sight back more than anything else in the world?





"No! No! I would rather walk with a friend in the dark than walk alone in the light.''




Sometimes the power of friendship is just unfathomable.

_______________________________________________________________

Its so amazing how a smile can make one's day.
Amusing isn't it?




I suddenly wonder, if I meet you on the streets one fine day after years, will you still smile at me?

(???) in my head

Date : Sunday, June 07, 2009
Time : 11:26:00 pm
Title : I've checked...and it is still there.

When one door of happiness closes, another opens. But many at times, we are so blinded by the closed door that we did not even realise there's another door that has been opened for us.
Why why why, must we be so clinged to the closed door and didn't even realise the opportunities presented right in front of our eyes?
Thats a lot of time wasted.
Sometimes, all it takes is for you to open your eyes widely and look around, and you will actually realise you have many great things in life..
But more than often, we are so occupied in the past...

I didn't know what life could bring me. But now I see, honestly.. I came to the sense.
Sometimes we don't realise what it means until its too late.
The heaviest thing I could ever carry is a grudge.
I would said the feeling is fading, a lot. Because sometimes, people just get so numbed to the pain after some time that they think they have forgotten about the painful part.
Though I would say that time has made the feelings for you disappear gradually,
the reason why I said that was because I don't see you
Deep in my heart, I clearly know the truth
I fully understand and know that if we meet again, the river of feelings will just flow back
those residual emotions, once there, will always be there.
Subconsciously and consciously, I do am aware of whats going on in the heart and brain.

Sometimes logic and sentiments clashes..
Its time for the heart and brain to understand each other, work with each other
Thinking about it, certain logic & reasoning, accompanied with sentiments, do make sense.
Sharings do make even more sense.
Think about the actions, the consequences. Hah.
How the cookie crumbles, let it be, let it off
Who knows, things are really predestinied in a way that, its a blessing in disguise
you'll never know the great surprises life can bring.

I feel optimistic yet a bit emo, a bit emo but still logical, still logical yet sentimental, sentimental yet quite irrational, and irrational yet optimistic. (...)
I know I've let you down,
I gave you too much pressure,
I did undesirable things,
I caused a mild nightmare,
Indeed I'm with a certain amount of remorse, but (....................)
funny funny
Its funny how things changes within just a mere few years..
So much for all the experiences that life gives.
In the end, we know it is worth it.

so many thoughts flooded my mind gate
its those challenges and obstacles that make us grow and move on ain't it?

Cause I've loved and lost the way you went off

Date : Saturday, June 06, 2009
Time : 10:12:00 pm
Title : She's pining for him.

Ever had river-flowing ideas of constructive topics to blog about? You clearly thought of everything in your head, you know what you want to say, but you just can't find a way to type it out... Simply because we don't have the mood, or we just can't get ourselves to type it out because we don't have the courage to put those thoughts into text... & thus blogging bud gets stuck, somewhere....

Date : Wednesday, June 03, 2009
Time : 9:19:00 pm
Title : Tampines 1 Mall

Think I'm gone? You won't get rid of me so easily.

-Went to YCK interchange, took 72 to Tampines, went to tampines interchange kiosks.....
-Bought nothing at the mall.
-Bought my bag!
-It was 5 plus when we were around Tampines interchange..
-Boarded bus 72 from there slightly after six. hmm...
-Tampines was very crowded!
-Alighted at the SRJC area, took 112 to Kovan.
-Ate my missed Minimelts ice cream!
-Bought flower (huahua, lol)!
-Took 112 back to my school.
-Took bus 132 back home!

-Burst a vessel in my nose, nose bleed. Emo emo bleed. :D
-Dig the dirt beneath my phone's wrap... 80% of my phone is wrapped you see. Dig dig dig, cut away the spoilt plastic from 2 segments, still got room for my itchy hands to dig.. :D
-OK THIS IS RANDOM.

Ok, Sleeping time.

Date : Tuesday, June 02, 2009
Time : 10:35:00 pm
Title : LOOK AT YOURSELF BEFORE YOU POINT FINGER AT OTHERS.

This story of sharing is taken from a friend's blog, whom she posted very long ago. :X Well-inspired from her blog.. I don't know if its her own thoughts, but if you happen to read this, don't mind me koping w/o permission! A story for life worth sharing here.

There was an old couple living just a street away. Every evening they would sit by their window ( which faces their neighbour's house) and sip their coffee, enjoying the afternoon sun. On top of that, the old lady would also never fail to criticize the neighbours clothes which were hung up to dry after the maid washes them, to her husband . The old lady claimed that the clothes were still filthy and that the neighbour's maid did not use enough detergent to wash the clothes. Her husband would have no comments and ignores her. Days after weeks after months, the old lady still never fails to tell her husband about the filthy clothes.. Till one fine day. They sat at their usual spot and the old lady was so shocked because the neighbour's clothes were spotless clean today, for once. She turned to her husband and shared her amusement. Her husband just sat there and said : oh, i've finally cleaned our window this morning.



Moral of the story, look at yourself before you judge others. If I'm able to pinpoint a criticism of another person, I would also be the the culprit of the criticism made because I'm able to identify it. Isn't it true? There are two things which go hand in hand, one is to internalize criticism and the other is judging yourself before judging others. I know i'm one of the culprits for behaving this way. Thus i figure let's accept it, No one is perfect, we aren't angels. Quit that bad habit. just a food for a thought.



Okay, lets all be happy. ^^